Second Book Revised

Yesterday, I uploaded the revised edition of the second book in the Lost Dogs series, Undeserved Second Chance. This one needed a lot more work than the previous book, which surprised me, as there weren’t any major content changes to deal with. I didn’t have to replace an entire chapter with two new ones, like with book one.

What I discovered when preparing for the revision was that the book, especially the first half, had a lot of language issues. Much of the prose just wasn’t particularly good. It was a bit dull, a bit boring, and filled with repetitions of things that had already just been said two paragraphs ago.

Fixing this took time, and rather than editing the existing prose, I ended up rewriting the introduction and the first few chapters. Here and there, I copied passages from the previous version, but even then, much of the text is new, even if none of the story actually changed. It just felt better doing it like that.

There were a few changes to the story overall, though. Most notably I took out the two flashback chapters and replaced them with a rewritten version of the first one, and I added one additional chapter at the end of the book.

This additional chapter is fairly short, and it’s there to tie up the story and connect it to the next one. In the original version of the book, the story just stopped, and the reader had no idea what to expect next. This new chapter hopes to fix that, so that it makes more sense to continue with Alene’s story, rather than leaving the reader hanging, wondering why I’m introducing a new character instead of continuing with Roy’s story.

For those of you who have already read Undeserved Second Chance, I’ve included the new chapter at the end of this post (it’s less than ten percent of the book). Obviously, it’s a bit of a spoiler, so if you’ve not read the book, you may want to skip that part.

First, though, I also included chapter titles with this book, as you can see here:


And now, from Lost Dogs #2: Undeserved Second Chance, I present to you…


Chapter 14

Time to Rumble

The wolf stood watch over him. Hackles raised and chest heaving. Exhausted from fighting off nightmares he couldn’t remember, but knew he’d had. His heart beat too fast, and the terrors of his mind still lurked just beyond the edge of awareness.

Little by little, the world came back into focus.

There was noise, and there was pain. Everything hurt, his stomach screamed for something to eat, and the hard surface under him swayed and vibrated.

Roy blinked against the darkness and tried to breathe.

The smell of stale sweat, blood, and filth washed over him, and bile rose in his throat. He tried to sit up, bumped his head on something just above, and lay down again.

Closed his eyes for just a moment.

– – –

When Roy woke again, the nightmares were gone, and his mind was clear. The stench, unfortunately, remained – and the hunger. He had no idea how long he’d been out, but probably over a day. His body still ached, and he’d soiled himself in his sleep, but the hole in his hand was gone.

His blood no longer burned with the taint of silver.

The affliction had done its job and healed his wounds.

He was alive, and he was free, and that was all that mattered.

Well, it’d be good to know where he was, and a shower and a change of clothes wouldn’t go amiss. He’d packed a towel. Might be time to put that to use.

Roy felt around for the backpack, found it and pulled it to him. He traced his hand along the ceiling until he located the hatch he’d climbed in through. Shuffled around a bit to get into position to open it, and pushed.

Daylight and fresh air rushed in to meet him. The wind tore at his hair and filled his nose with the scents of the world outside.

Mud and standing water.

More kinds of vegetation than he could count.

None of the salty tang of the sea.

Squinting against the light, Roy raised his head up through the hatch and looked out.

Enormous trees rising out of murky brown water.

Shafts of sunlight filtering in through the canopy far above.

From every vine and every branch, lichen hung like long beards, speckled with little white flowers, and alive with insects and butterflies.

Roy stared, tried to wrap his mind around what he saw, and eventually he cursed. Loud, foul, and long. He must have been out for days.

The mid-south swamps.

This was not where he needed to be, but it was the only explanation. Nowhere else would you’d find nature like this. A vast, nearly impenetrable band of marshland jungle. As close to lawless land as you’d find within the civilised world. Corporate city states built to harvest pearl slugs and swamp gas.

Only the truly desperate came here.

Fitting.

So much for a quick ride up the coast. Set him back a week, easily.

Grumbling under his breath, Roy grabbed hold of the edge of the hatch and pulled himself upright. Stood in the hatch, flung his arms wide, and raised his head. Let the wind rip into him. A deafening roar of air and light. Tore at his hair and clothes, and drowned out everything else.

Every thought and every emotion.

Every worry and every doubt.

The wolf loved it.

The speed and the wind and all the interesting new scents.

Roy couldn’t help but smile to himself. Sometimes, when travelling by train, he liked to open a window and stick his head out, just to make the wolf happy. It’s joy and excitement would rub off on him, and this was no exception. Despite everything, it wasn’t long until he grinned like a fool, for no other reason than that his inner beast loved the wind in his hair.

Perhaps there was a lesson to learn from that.

He was here now, and like it or not, he’d just have to deal.

There would be a town eventually, and a train station. There’d be showers, and a place to eat. He could get a ticket out of here, on an actual passenger train.

He’d also need to find an open pack he could join for the full moon, but there was time enough for that once he found a town. The main thing was, he was still free, he was still on the move, and there was no way the syndicate would be able to catch up with him now. Not here.

Things would be fine.


There we go. I hope you enjoyed it. If you have any questions or comments, I’d love to hear them.

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